To: all the friends I killed

After the death of his best friend, a young man vanishes from the United States, seeking a fresh start in France. He stumbles upon work at a vineyard, and thinks he has found a way out in a land of ancestral beauty.

But he quickly discovers Europe alone can’t solve his problems. Haunted by his past, he has to come to terms with his own and his society’s expectations of adulthood. Dark enchanted truths about love and friendship complicate the story of how he lost his best friend — a sister, a girlfriend, a lodestar.
In this coming-of-age novel, we are faced with the life choices of the millennial generation, the postponement of traditional benchmarks in our twenties, and the queer or asexual attitude towards contemporary loneliness.

“A memorably original work, full of mystery, madness, and wicked laugh-out-loud humor.”
—Stephen McCauley
The Object of My Affection

“Engrossing insights—such as how the loss of a close friend is not considered as significant as the death of a romantic partner [...] Intriguing.”—Kirkus Reviews

“I read To: All The Friends I Killed in a single sitting, and when I finished the last page I felt as if I’d woken from a startling and evocative dream. In less than two hundred pages, Bookman gives one of the most gripping, haunting accounts of guilt and the search for belonging that I can remember reading in a very long time. His prose is razor-sharp, and his eye is unrelenting. This isn’t a book to miss.”
—Grant Ginder, author of Let’s Not Do That Again and The People We Hate at the Wedding